10 Things I Had to Unlearn About Healing, Spirituality and Letting Go | Guy Lawrence

Guy:
For over a decade or so, I’ve been obsessed with one question, how do we take this spiritual work, energy, intuition, the divine, all the things that can sound, I guess, a little woo woo, and bring it into everyday life in a way that’s actually useful? Because I didn’t come into this world remembering any of this, I can assure you.

I’m a guy from Wales who used to play rugby, ended up working on a building site, and knew absolutely nothing about spirituality. But since then, I’ve interviewed some of the most extraordinary minds in consciousness and healing. I’ve facilitated thousands of people now, no exaggeration, through in-person retreats and workshops.

And over the years, my own capacity to hold and conduct what I experience as energy from source, the divine, whatever words you want to label, has continued to deepen, and creating a space where people can begin to access their own healing and something deeper within themselves along with that. It’s pretty cool, right? And through all of that, I’ve had to unlearn a hell a lot of what I thought inner work actually was. So today, I want to share 10 things I genuinely wish somebody had told me when I first started. Let’s go.

Guy:
All right, here we go. 10 things in 10 minutes. Let’s see if I can knock them out without going off in absolute tangents. So number one, I’ve got some notes here by the way. Uh, number one, you’re already perfect. You’re already whole. You’re already complete. You are a divine being having a human experience.

That is you. That is me. That is us. I believe this wholeheartedly. I experience this. So with that in mind, there’s nowhere, nothing to learn. There’s nowhere to go. You’re already it. It’s a remembrance. It’s a remembrance So ultimately, we’re stripping away the things that are clouding who we truly are.

It’s very powerful. Sit with that. Let’s see if I can get this done in 10 minutes. Number two What have we got? You can’t think your way through everything. How often do we just rely upon the mind for answers? And if we don’t know, if uncertainty and the mind’s starting to go, “Oh, no, no, no, no, no,” we, we shy away and pull back.

Why? Because we, we don’t like the unknown, and we are so conditioned to be reliant upon the mind, anything else feels foreign to us. And if it’s foreign to us, if it’s unknown, uh, and if it’s an unknown, it’s a threat. If it’s a threat, it’s fear. If it’s fear, it means death. No. Okay? No. Uh, the, the, the mi- the, the heart Informs the mind.

This is where we’re going. I truly believe this. As human species and beings, the way of the mind, look at the structures in society, all done from the mind. Look at the way we’ve been doing things. Okay? the divine energy, feminine energy is, is coming back, and there’s an equilibrium starting to happen, right?

I always like to think, you know, the glass is, is the male, and the water, the fluent, is the female. Together, they go hand in hand, so we can have this contained fluidity and actually get the rewards from the water. Rivers need river banks. If we’re just all over the place as this energetic place in the creative side, we, we, we need structure as well, yeah?

So I’m not harping on about the mind as a bad thing, but we need the balance. Okay? That’s point number two. So we’re nurturing the heart to inform the mind. The glass and the water go together, and we move forward. What a revelation that is. Oh my God. All right. Number three, I wish somebody had told me sooner.

Your body remembers. So we can analyze the shit out of everything. We can analyze stuff. This has happened in my past, this and that, and then we take the stories, and we make meanings, and we got all this stuff going on, right? And then it’s like, I’m gonna heal this bit. I’m gonna just fix that bit over there because that’s what my mind can rationalize and do.

And then you’re disregarding all the information at a quantum energetic level within the body that the mind can’t even conceptualize that is stored in there like information. I bet if you went to your iPhone and started going to the cloud or the info- informational database, you wouldn’t even know what the hell is in there until you saw, “Oh, shit, that’s right.

That came up. Oh, that’s it. I got that there,” right? Who cares? But when you wanna defrag the hard drive and change the software on it, it just does its thing, right? You don’t need to know. So we have this tendency that unless we can conceptualize and hang onto it, then things are not happening or things are not healing.

But the body keeps the score. It remembers, and for me, that’s in an energetic level. And once you understand, that’s so freeing because we don’t even have to know. As long as we keep setting ourselves up in environments to, to evolve and win, then brilliant. We gotta work with the body. The body … Like, if we remove the mind, let the body inform, release.

I always remember reveal, feel, and heal. We can do that. We don’t need the mind to do that. You don’t need the mind for your lungs to breathe right now while you’re watching this. You don’t need the mind for the blood to move around your body and deliver oxygen and nutrients while you’re watching this right now.

There’s such a divine energy that is moving through us, it is phenomenal. The body. Okay, work with the body. Uh, number four. How am I going? Geez, I’m running behind my 10 minutes now. Trying to force a breakthrough can become another form of control. Whoa, how good’s that one? So what I see so often then and, is that we start pushing.

We gotta make this happen. We, and then we start striving, and then we start burrowing into this work. And ultimately there’s still, if we need control, con- then there’s still ultimately a bit of us underneath that is fearful and scared because if we languish that, lose control, what’s gonna happen? So why are we forcing and pushing something in the first place?

Surrender versus force are two very different things, and striving and pushing. Don’t get me wrong, I love to achieve, I love… I still set goals, but I, I don’t force outcomes. I really don’t. I loved Amit Goswami’s, uh, the quantum physicist who I had on the podcast a while back. He… I’m doing this with my fingers ’cause hopefully the editor will put in, um, a little video of him talking.

But, uh, ’cause he really, he didn’t discover the heart and love till he was 80 years old, and he was in this academic world his whole life. And I said, “Well, how do you deal with that now with the mind?” And then he said, “Oh, I just dooby, dooby, dooby, do,” which is brilliant, right? You- there’s doing, so we’re in the doing, but we’re also in the state of being.

It’s also almost similar to the glass and the water, right? Dooby, dooby, dooby, do. Anyway, let’s keep moving. So hopefully these, uh, uh, arrive. So n- the next one, you don’t need the perfect intention. You don’t need to, you don’t need to know everything to take a step forward, in other words. Quite often, it- I’ve always said indecision is the worst decision of all.

When you make no choice and you’re in that stuck limbo place, it is painful. It can feel like the life force is sucking out of you. Sometimes you just gotta get moving and completely stuff it up, but that’s okay as well, right? I couldn’t think my way into where I am today and what I’m doing and all this stuff that’s opened up in my world is… still boggles my mind.

But it, it enriches my heart. That’s the difference, right? And I’ve just had this habit of just feeling this feels kinda right, but I, it… Let’s just take the step anyway. One little step every day. Our day is made up of incremental small choices, and we’re the sum total of that day. How we do one thing is how we do everything

So intention’s great, having a North Star is great, but the way comes clear once we take the, take the steps. We start walking on it. We book into this. We, we embrace that. We, we put skin in the game. We, we get off our ass and actually feel the uncertainty of it all, and the rush, and the excitement of life as well.

It, it’s the way to go. Anyway, it’s just, this is just my… Wonder about, how am I doing? Okay, I’m not gonna get done there. Okay, number s- point number six, healing doesn’t always need to look dramatic. Does– You don’t need to have these massive, uh, what’s that word? Ca- catharsisisms, you know, and, “Oh my God, if I’m not doing this intense breathwork and, and having the ground shake above me, and light, beams of light coming through my third eye and pineal gland, and mystical angels coming down and bowing around you,” or whatever it is, “then I’m not having an experience.

I’m not healing. I’m not gaining.” Well, that’s just bull@#$%, and that is undermining the source of it. If you go back to m- my solo podcast I released last week, um, it talks about the source. Some of the more subtle movements on a non-physical level, downstream can manifest into an avalanche of a wave. The key is, is that ultimately if we’re chasing the experience or chasing or wanting all these things, we’re actually not surrendering into the moment, and we’re not trusting in the divine.

We- if we are chasing experiences, we are not believing at some level or at some depth that there is not a universal force that is creating all the planets, everything within us, that’s in our driving seat with us, supporting us, helping us out. At some level, we don’t believe that, because if we need reassurance to have these big catharsisms and mystical experiences or forcing them, then, then we’re undermining what’s happening in the moment, in any given moment.

So the key is to just let it all go. Let it all go. Doesn’t need to be dramatic. It can just be plod along and, and, and move through it. Okay? Uh, point number seven, old things resurfacing don’t mean you’re going backwards. Absolutely, but the key is, because if you look at a splinter, and let’s say that’s an energetical splinter, the, and, and the, the body actually will know how to remove the splinter if we…

Like, it can get pus and things like that, and there’s, like, these antibodies that are happening and stuff, right? I don’t know if this is a good enough analogy. But what I’ve found in doing healing work, and this energetic work, and working with divine energy that’s coming through, and then as that energy moves through another person or we’re allowing it to continue to move, then of course anything that’s not within that purity will start to release of what the body’s ready to let go of.

And as it’s ready to let go of that, it then kinda has to move through the physical and then out. That’s how I kinda see it. So quite often the body feels like it’s releasing the symptom. But the key is, is that you’re not bringing in the story or the emotional charge around it and then just rehearsing it. 

You’re actually stepping into the fire, as my mate San Qing calls it. You’re just leaning in and being with it and allowing yourself to feel it without the s- without the, the victimhood of the story that’s going with it, because you can observe it, and you built enough awareness and, and foundational capacity and resilience within you to understand that and hold that space within you.

And then the body heals. That, the, that’s how it continues to move. And just as a caveat, this word healing, the body is healing 24/7, every day of the week. Cells turn all over time. Healing is not some mythical unicorn that it goes off in the distance, and once I’m healed, I can go on and carry on with my life and still do the other things that are sabotaging myself in the first place. 

How we do one thing is how we do everything, and the more m- present we become and the more things that we can do in our lives to support the body, understanding that it’s constantly regenerating all the time, the more we set ourselves up to win. Okay. Uh, point number eight. Where am I? Yeah, surrender is, is completely different from giving up There’s, y- you know, it’s not, it’s not, not wanting an outcome, it’s relinquishing the outcome.

What I’ve found is, is the more I’ve set myself up where I don’t need to s- to chase anything to feel fear, to feel, uh, safe within me, like there’s this never enough lack mentality. That’s where I feel like at the core of this, I’ve diffused so much in my life. Like, ’cause I grew up, uh, financially struggling, and that was kind of in my nervous system.

Even today, if you tune into the media for just two minutes, oh my God, there’s some noise going on about interest rates or politicians or the banks or some disaster, some war, and it’s always creating this uncertainty and this fear within me that it’s like, “Oh my God, I- I’m, I haven’t got enough here. I’m, I gotta make sure I got some more in the bank, otherwise I’m gonna starve and die,” and, you know.

Like, it’s like you’re tuning into this energy all of a sudden that feels horrific, and that’s, we’re wiring our nervous system with that and, and then it strives for this, this more, right? And then eventually we just give up, like. But if we surrender to… What I’ve learned, like, what I’m trying to say is that within my body, my nervous system, the more I’ve worked with myself and allowed my, nurtured my body into the present moment and more into the remembrance of who we are, then you, you, you relinquish the push for the outcome, which allows you to surrender.

Now, I’m still very passionate. I work very hard, but none of it feels like work, even coming in, making sure I carve out time to do these podcasts. Like, these take actually effort and financial commitment just to have these out every week, right? You know, there’s all these things, but I surrender to the outcome.

I don’t, I just l- let it do its thing, ’cause intentionally in my heart, my soul, and everything is, is much more aligned. So There’s a difference. So I would just encourage you to look at where you’re kind of giving up on or shying away from or denying yourself from, but actually surrendering into and then allowing of what’s actually wanting to reveal itself to you.

Uh, point number nine, quickly, you don’t have to do all this all alone. That’s a big one. I c- I only got off a phone to a good friend I hadn’t spoke to in ages. Uh, shout out to Tracy if you end up listening to my podcast or not. I but she was saying that she’s been going through a lot at the moment and goes into becoming a hermit, uh, which we all tend to do.

Sometimes the, the deeper the, the, the transformation we’re going through, the transmutation of, of, of the old stuff into the new, uh, it’s very natural. We would just wanna hide a bit and get away from people and everything like that. But there’s also a point where you really have to lean in and draw into connection, and draw into connection with not only yourself, but with others and, and support and, uh, i- it’s, it’s, it’s really valid, and that’s why we bring people together at retreats, and that’s why in my, um, energy group healings that I’m doing online now, I’m doing them in small groups and stuff, so there’s containers, and I think it’s really powerful.

But sometimes if we’re intimidated or feel in a certain way, we just shy away from it, and we just, oh, wanna be stay inward, right? So but, uh, I wouldn’t encourage it. Uh, that’s just me. Uh, and number ten is with all this information and knowledge, at some point you gotta step in. You actually have to experience it.

It’s through embodiment is where we learn. Embodiment. I even had Dr. Sue Morter on recently on the podcast, and I love the way she framed it. It’s not about enlightenment, it’s actually about embodiment. This enlightenment malarkey is like it’s taking me outside of myself and I’m g- I’m striving for something, but we’re actually pulling it in, right?

We’re pulling it in, and the more we embody it, and the more that’s not Remember the body remembers. So remember what’s not in resonance will just slowly vacate and leave. This is a journey. This is not a destination. This is an ongoing journey of evolution. The, the body, the nervous system is dynamic. It learns.

It, it, it adapts and it expands from it. So when… Jump in. That’s what, that’s what I do. I, I just keep just chugging away every week like a freight train. Just boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Just chipping away, chipping away, chipping away, and who knows where you’re gonna be five years from now if you, like, take this on board and just start applying it in your life.

You’re going this way, and then you move this way slightly, and the next thing you know, phew, where could you be five years from now, right? Look at it. Be realistic. Anyway, I didn’t get it in 10 minutes. I’m sorry, but I did my best. ‘Cause apparently now on YouTube videos, you just have to, like, get in there and just go, otherwise you lose them.

But ultimately, I only want people consuming that really wanna be here and want to evolve spiritually. Anyway, that’s it from me. I hope you got something out of this. Let me know in the comments below. It seems it’s f- it’s felt quiet lately for some reason. But, uh, a couple of announcements. Uh, I’ll be in the USA very soon, uh, just outside Vegas, three days.

Come and join us, me and my buddy Matt Omo. I do the events with over here, and Taoist Master San Qing. So we will be in, uh, the USA three days. It’s gonna be powerful. Uh, there’ll be a link below for that. I am opening up to doing, uh, group healing, so there’s information on that as well. Uh, if you want to…

No matter where you are on your own path or journey, come and explore it. Uh, who knows? Anyway, much love from me. Hope you enjoyed this episode, and I’ll see you soon.

I’m standing here right now in Lake Taupo in a beautiful retreat space, and there’s a vast difference between an intellectual experience and passive listening to a fully embodied lived experience, ’cause that’s what retreats can do. They can help you land, start to truly reconnect to yourself, to others, to nature, and to spirit as well. 

There’s so much in it. That’s why we created Live in Flow, and that’s why we are so passionate about getting this work out there and bringing people together. If you wanna find out more when our next retreat or event is coming up, just check out the link below.