#177 In this podcast episode, Guy talked with Paul Aurand, a regression therapist, about his book Essential Healing and how people can heal by reconnecting with their “essential self” or soul essence rather than relying only on the analytical mind. Paul explained a layered process that begins with befriending the mental mind so it can step back, then opening the heart as a doorway to the inner world, releasing stored emotions without needing every story detail, and working with beliefs and survival strategies.
They discussed how emotions are energy stored in the body, ways to safely express and release them, and how pain can carry messages and soul lessons without requiring suffering to learn. Paul outlined additional layers including inner child (wounded and wonder child), parts like the inner critic and protector, ancestral “baggage,” accessing inner wisdom, soul memory through regression, and finally soul essence, and he shared the NDE message to listen to heart, soul, and spirit.
If you enjoyed this podcast, you may also like: What My Near Death Experience Taught Me About Life & Our Subconscious Mind | Paul Aurand
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About Paul: Paul Aurand is a dynamic educator, award winning Master Hypnotherapist, and Hypnotherapy Instructor who has worked in the field for over 35 years. He has been honored as “Educator of the Year,” “Therapist of the Year,” and “Hypnotherapist of the Year.”
Paul was the first elected President of the Michael Newton Institute (TNI) and is TNI’s director of Education and a lead trainer. He is the founder and director of the Holistic Healing Centre in NYC.
Paul has been featured in film and television for his work with the groundbreaking Life Between Lives Regression Therapy developed by DR. Michael Newton. Paul is the originator of the Soul Essence Activation and the Body Wisdom Process.
►Audio Version:
Key points with time stamp:
- (00:00) – From Womb to Source — What’s Really Driving Your Thoughts & Emotions!
- (00:25) – Welcome Back and Big Views
- (01:41) – What Paul Does
- (03:30) – Why Essential Healing
- (05:07) – Healing From Within
- (06:41) – Lightning and Expanded Consciousness
- (09:56) – Working With the Mind
- (16:07) – From Mind to Heart
- (20:07) – Releasing Stored Emotions
- (24:02) – Feelings as Energy
- (28:03) – Guilt and Body Sensations
- (31:40) – Anger and Safe Expression
- (33:33) – Do Challenges Teach Us
- (35:09) – Pain As A Messenger
- (36:23) – Soul Lessons Beyond Suffering
- (39:15) – Healing The Inner Child
- (43:00) – Working With Inner Parts
- (49:03) – Releasing Ancestral Baggage
- (54:06) – Accessing The Wise One
- (56:17) – Soul Memory And Past Lives
- (59:24) – Reconnecting With Soul Essence
- (01:02:09) – Book Intentions And Final Message
Paul’s Website:
paulaurand.com
Paul’s book, Essential Healing:
paulaurand.com/essential-healing-book/
About me:
My Instagram:
www.instagram.com/guyhlawrence/?hl=en
My website:
www.guylawrence.com.au
www.liveinflow.co
TRANSCRIPT
Paul: [00:00:00] I’ll share the message I received when I was out of body and during my near death experience, and that was listen, listen to your heart. Listen to your soul. Listen to spirit, listen. And I think it’s a process of learning to listen, getting through the layers that you can really hear. But listen.
Guy: Paul, welcome back to the podcast. I should say thank you for joining me. Thank you.
Paul: Yeah, so good to be with you again.
Guy: I was looking only the other day, and I don’t know if you know this, um, I think, I don’t even know how many interviews I’ve done now. I’m gonna let it in podcast. It’s about 150 odd, I think.
Paul: Wow.
Guy: Maybe even more. 160 odd over [00:01:00] the three year span. Impressive. And our original interview we did on YouTube has had the most views of any of the shows I’ve done.
Paul: Is that right?
Guy: So, and I think it’s like 75,000, 80,000 views so far.
Paul: Fantastic.
Guy: Um, and what that shows me is that people are clearly hungry for this work. I believe they have to be with that kind of, um, with that kind of exposure and interest, you know.
Paul: I think it’s so needed. It took me a
Guy: long time to put together. But your book today.
Paul: Yeah. Yeah,
Guy: yeah, yeah. So my question to you is just before we dive in and um, is I ask everyone on the show, if you were at a dinner party right now and you sat next to a stranger and they asked you what you did for a living, what would you say?
Paul: Help people remember who they really are and, and be [00:02:00] that,
Guy: what kind of reaction do you normally get?
Paul: Um, I think people are curious then, and wanna know more about how you do that and, and what that really means. Um, when they hear I’m a regression therapist, there’s often a. Quizzical look on their face. Not quite sure what that is or how that works. Um, most people are curious, and I’ve been doing this for a long time, and I have to tell you that since the eighties or nineties, early nineties when I started with this, people thought it was pretty curious or weird or bizarre.
But, um, it’s pretty common knowledge and practice now. I think that the, the doors are really open for us. People are really seeking, I think most of us miss that connection with ourselves [00:03:00] and other people and, and with the all really, um, I think there’s a great longing in, in each of us to feel connected again, especially with these last, it feels like years now, but this, this past year anyway, right.
Guy: Yeah, massively. A hundred percent. And, uh, it definitely feels more common conversation even from in my world. And, um, you know, and I had the good, there’s a couple of things I’ve been thinking about and which way to start this podcast as well, Paul. And, you know, I had a good forward, you forward me a copy of your book, essential Healing. And by the way, I, I just love it. I absolutely love it. And, um, I was curious to know why the title Essential Healing?
Paul: Hmm, yeah. It’s, it’s really, um, dual meaning, so what I saw over 30 years in practice that there were some pretty specific monumental, [00:04:00] significant breakthrough sessions that people had. And, and I started working to put those together so that people could do that for themself as well. And the, the real underlying or core theme in this is to reconnect with your essential self, what I call soul essence. Your your core self, original, authentic self. And once you reconnect with that and go through these layers to get to it, and the practices help you get through the layers, is that once you’ve contacted that inner flame as I experienced it, it can begin to emerge and do a lot of the healing itself.
So it’s not on such a cognitive level, but it’s really healing from within with your own inner wisdom, power, strength that comes from your core being. So essential healing is healings that are necessary [00:05:00] for many of us to go through, but it’s healing with our own essence as well.
Guy: Yeah. I’m, I’m always fascinated as well. Over the years I’ve, maybe it’d be nice to share some examples of experiences you work with. ’cause I know in my life, in my world and growing up, I was conditioned to always look externally to fix something with, and I never really thought of going within. It never occurred to me, you know, I actually had to have a big awakening with bells, fireworks and whistles to go, oh, I, I, I see it in a, in a very different manner now, you know?
Paul: Yeah.
Guy: So, I, I’m always curious to see maybe for listeners as well, what can occur if we are willing to start to heal from the inside out. If, if, uh, put it one way, I guess.
Paul: Yeah. I think it’s a major [00:06:00] problem looking outside of ourselves. I mean, there is a lot. To be found outside, but I think the first place we have to look is within and it’s, I think that’s a safer thing too. It’s not dependent on someone else, another power outside of ourselves, but discovering that it’s really within us. And in that process, I think that we can go from being our thinking mind, our analytical mind, and not, maybe not even knowing that there’s a lot more to us than that. When I got hit by Lightning and had that near death experience, I was freed from for a period of time, from the limits of the mental mind.
And I, I think that the book really tries to help people. Do their own practices so that they can be free of that [00:07:00] mental mind. Not that it’s gone absent or asleep, but, but that it will step back enough that the consciousness can expand beyond the limits of that mental mind, give you a more objective perspective and a higher perspective.
And, and so moving out of the limited mental mind and moving into the heart, the realm of feelings, um, memory, beliefs, then we can begin to work with some of those things that operate inside of us. I think the three big ones are stored emotions that limit us in many ways or cause us to react in certain ways.
Um, beliefs, right? We all carry certain beliefs, often formed very young, but formed in previous lives as well. Those beliefs are very real, but I. Not necessarily true. So they can really limit us. They really influence how we operate. Um, and so becoming free [00:08:00] of the first, recognizing what they are and how they influence and affect us, and then establishing new ones that are more supportive, that helpful and healing.
And then the really big one, once you’re out of your intellectual mind and diving through those layers is the survival strategies, things that we all learn to do, to stay safe in life, to get love and acceptance, right? So those, those are the drivers in our life. And, and my intention with this book and the practices is to go past those so you’re not so controlled or, or ruled by those and go to that very core self that’s full of great light, wisdom, power, um, creativity, love, and connection.
I think once you make that connection with yourself and that inner wisdom, then it’s time to work with your guides [00:09:00] and, and, and, uh, and your past and otherwise beings.
Guy: Yeah. Amazing. You know, it, it, it fascinates me ’cause I’m not sure I’ve spoken about this with you before or anything, but I, in a meditation, I actually had a, um, a massive movement of energy and, and started to research what it was. Mm-hmm. And it kind of opened me up in a way that, um, I think a part of it never really closed back afterwards, and it really
Paul: mm-hmm.
Guy: Opened my mind and my, and shouted a lot of fundamental beliefs, you know, and start to be open to looking at regression and open to thinking about past lives or guides. And, and it was something that never really occurred to me before, um, just because my reality didn’t. Um, have that in any shape or form. When we start to look at this, [00:10:00] how much do we need to be open to the work, I guess, for, for it to start to take effect? Um, because, but our beliefs can get even in the way of that as well.
Paul: For sure, for sure. When I began, I mean, I had a, a sudden experience somewhat like yours when I was hit by lightning, right? That was something that caused profound change in many, many ways. Um, but it’s traumatic as well. And so after that I was really searching, how can I help someone have that kind of. Transformative experience without having to come so close to death without the injury or the trauma. And so it took a long time to, to figure that out.
And, and there are are different ways to do that. The life between life regression work that I do is one way Michael Newton developed this methodology of, [00:11:00] of regressing someone back through time, through childhood and into the womb and past life and death scene in the past life, and then on into spirit to remember that time between their lives when they’re planning to come to earth, right?
And so that’s a kind of thing that’s pretty hard to facilitate your, for yourself as much as I do it for other people. I, I can’t really guide myself there, but you certainly can guide yourself to reconnect with your own soul and spirit. Remember yourself as this divine being. Remember yourself as something.
Far beyond your, your mental mind or your, your intellect. And so, but as I started that work, my mental mind said, no, don’t do that. Something bad will happen. It really put the brakes on. It was so afraid of losing control. And I think that’s something that people commonly experience when they try to meditate or do [00:12:00] this deeper spiritual work.
Um, mental mind I think really wants to protect us. I don’t think it, it’s really wants to stop us, but it, I had certain beliefs that if I lost control with my mental mind, that then something bad would happen, right? I, I wasn’t even sure exactly what it was, and I think I tried to battle with my mind to make it stop or go away and was really quite unsuccessful with that.
It just dug its heels in even more and. What I found worked was to thank it, to acknowledge it and say you’ve done a great job for all these years of keeping me safe, keeping it together, going through some difficult times and, and holding the pieces together because that’s really its job, right? Um, but this works really important to me, and I need you not to go away, but to [00:13:00] release your grip enough to step back enough that I can make this journey inward and mental mind.
If you are really concerned that something dangerous or hurtful or harmful is going to happen, then by all means tell me, step in, put the brakes on, protect me if you really feel you need to do that. And it was just like some tight. Clenched fists sort of went, oh, okay. And it could step back enough to observe and record what’s happening rather than trying to do it for me.
’cause that’s what we’re used to do is using our mind to, to figure things out and accomplish things. It’s a really different, um, experience and practice to have mental mind be present, but not doing it. For me, it’s, it’s a bit like, one of the analogy I use is if you’re in a, a play or a movie, you would be a more passive observer in the audience.
You wouldn’t try [00:14:00] to project a scene onto the screen or under the stage. And at first you don’t know the, the plot or the characters exactly what’s going to unfold, but you’re more the observer of it. And so there’s the intention of going in, but there isn’t the doing. We’re used to doing right. Thinking, reasoning, willing, this sort of thing. And it’s, it, it isn’t that at all. And so it takes some time to learn how to trust and how to navigate when you’re not using just your mental mind.
Guy: Yeah. That’s massive,
Paul: isn’t it? So yeah, I think that’s one of the Yeah, absolutely. And it’s one of the first and most important steps to the process is, is well, having mental mind be more of a, an ally rather than making it an enemy.
Guy: Totally. And I’m guessing that’s why it’s because you speak of nine chapters and nine, nine layers within the [00:15:00] book that we, you start to take people on the journey on with the processes and work through. And I’m guessing that’s why mental mind is right at the top.
Paul: Absolutely.
Guy: Yeah,
Paul: that’s right.
Guy: Yeah.
Paul: And, and it’s one of the first things you need to learn to do is to get out of that grip of the analytical mental mind.
Guy: Yeah.
Paul: Without making an enemy of it.
Guy: Absolutely. So when it, it does fascinate me that, and, and the way that this has been structured. So I wouldn’t mind diving into a little bit to that. So let’s say we begin to acknowledge the mind, acknowledge that it’s here to, to protect me. And I’m becoming, uh, uh, my, um, my dear friend Matt, who I work with always has a mantra. He tells everyone. It’s like, uh, I, I, I, I acknowledge you, I something like, I see you. I love you. Let’s talk later, you know, [00:16:00] to when he is speaking into his mind. Um
Paul: mm-hmm.
Guy: Once. Once we start to allow the mind to lose grip, you then speak of the second layer of the heart. Why? Why from the mind and then into the heart. Mm-hmm.
Paul: Yeah. I think moving from thinking into feeling shifts us from conscious, rational mind into subconscious mind, which is more associated with our beliefs, our feelings and emotions, our survival strategies. And so when you can move from thinking into feeling, you will begin to, a number of things happen. Um, I think one of the first things, uh, first [00:17:00] steps of that journey within is I really perceive the heart center. As the doorway to one’s inner world, and most of us have experienced emotional pain in our lives. And as a result and out of necessity, we’ve built protection around our
Guy: heart
Paul: in order to stay safe, in order to try to prevent being hurt again. But one of the unfortunate things that occurs when we have a substantial heart shield is that we, it makes it much more difficult to access our own inner world and to other things that happen when we have the substantial heart shield is that when love does come our way, it’s, it can be very difficult to let it in because this is blocking us, right?
And how many people feel lonely? Alone because of this [00:18:00] protection. They want contact, they want connection, they want love, they wanna express love. But there’s this substantial protection in place that prevents it from getting in. And it, it prevents so much of it from getting out as well. And, and with that protection in place, the hurts, the wounds that we carry from the past, how can we process them?
How, how can we release the stored emotions when this barrier is in place? It holds them in, right? And so really the second layer, or step, if you will, in the process is working with his heart protection and working to find a way to open that heart, because that is the doorway to the inner world. And once you get that heart open, then a number of things will happen.
There’s often some emotional release emotions we’ve carried from the past will begin to rise to the surface. And then we process them basically. Emotions want to be [00:19:00] expressed and, and we’ve suppressed them or repressed them and internalized them. They just want out. They want expression, they want to be externalized.
And you don’t have to dig through every single trauma or thing that occurred that caused you pain, but that energy of the pain, whatever it might be, you can release it, you can find. And so there are a number of emotional release techniques in the book. There’s a volcano release, there’s balloon release, but they’re all different ways of releasing stored emotions that are weighing us down, holding us back, feeding our habits, um, causing us to keep this protection in place.
So that’s, that’s really the next layer is this heart opening and, um, getting in touch with, and working with the feelings that lie beneath that.
Guy: I love it. I always used to think it was just a metaphor. Open your heart until it actually happened. And the, the, the movement of those emotions and the grief that I held [00:20:00] and I could physically feel some of it come outta my body. It was unbelievable. The, I’m, I’m curious, you’ve mentioned something and I’m speaking to the people, the analytical people in there. Do you, from your experience, do you find that
Paul: mm-hmm.
Guy: We don’t even need to know what the trauma is at all? Or does it help sometimes? Or can we just, or we just move in energy anyway?
Paul: Hmm. I think that. When someone comes into work with me, they often want to know who did what, exactly what happened. They want to know the details, and that’s so cognitive. I say, you know, it’s not the details. It’s not who did what to whom and, and exactly what, what happened. It’s how did it leave you feeling?
That’s the important thing, [00:21:00] not exactly what, what was done or what happened. How did it leave you feeling? What did it cause you to believe? I’m not enough, it’s my fault, et cetera, et cetera. It, how did you survive it, right? When you experience trauma, when you experience pain, even a relatively small pain, something happens inside.
When we experience a strong emotion, and that’s such a conscious level, we develop a survival strategy. Well, I. I got hurt so many times. I got less. I got abandoned. I got betrayed so many times. I can’t handle being hurt again. So I’m going to, and fill in the blank. I’m going to not engage in relationship.
I’m going to leave before they leave. You know, we, we all have our, I’m gonna be responsible. I’m going to be the pleaser. I’m going to be the caretaker. I’m gonna rescue people, but no one can come near [00:22:00] me. Right? And so, yeah, these survival strategies of the things that really cause great trouble. And so, to answer your question, I don’t think we need to know exact details about what happened.
We need to know how did it make me feel? What did lead me believing, and how did I survive it? And then that’s what we need to work with. As we do that, maybe some of the details will come, and then on a mental level, we can say, okay, but if you, I’ve seen too many people that know what happened. They’re still stuck with the feelings. They’re still stuck with the survival strategy. You know, they have a cognitive awareness of it, but it doesn’t solve it.
Guy: Yeah. And then to start solving that is obviously going into the heart of the first place, like you say, because we become aware. And then from there in the, the third layer, you talk about stored emotion. Mm-hmm. Um, which does fascinate me as well.
Paul: Yeah.
Guy: Because I know for myself personally, when dealing with emotions, [00:23:00] I, I would have this strange relationship with it because I almost felt like I’m, my body would wanna shut down ’cause I’m about to relive the pain. But I’ve sort of found over time that’s not necessarily the case. Would you mind speaking to a little bit about that, of what you found? My head keeps clipping that, uh, over time.
I am standing here right now in Lake Topo in a beautiful retreat space, and there’s a vast difference between an intellectual experience and passive listening to a fully embodied lived experience. ’cause that’s what retreats can do. They can help you land, start to truly reconnect to yourself. To others, to nature and to spirit as well.
There’s so much in it. That’s why we created Live and Flow, and that’s why we are so passionate about getting this work out there and bringing people together. If you wanna find out more when our next retreat or event is coming up, just check out the link below and [00:24:00] now back to the podcast.
Paul: Uh, I don’t think you have to relive it. There are those who would, would, um, differ with me on that, but I don’t think you have to relive it. I think that you have to be aware that it’s there. It’s helpful to find out where in your body you carry it, because we experience different emotions in different parts of the body.
They tend to be stored in different places. Um, and once we, I really think of it more as energy. You know, anger, sadness, fear, they all, they’re all energy. We have our thoughts about them. We have our mental judgment about them. I should have this feeling. I shouldn’t have that feeling. This is good feeling.
That’s a bad feeling. But they’re really just feelings. They’re just energy regardless of how we judge them. And when we can locate them and give them some safe form of expression, whether it’s [00:25:00] talking, painting, yelling, singing, dancing, running. They just need to be expressed in some way, and you don’t have to know all the details, you don’t have to know all the facts.
It’s not a court of law, it’s an expression. It’s just emotional release work really is about finding the emotions, identifying them because they’re uncomfortable. We tend to anesthetize them. We tend to ignore them. We tend to move away from them. Really, it was my work for five years in a clinic where we specialized in patients with chronic illness and chronic pain, and I was anesthetizing their pain using hypno anesthesia, and it was effective for weeks sometimes, but then they were back again.
You know, we weren’t, it was, it was a, a symptomatic treatment. It wasn’t resolving the underlying cause [00:26:00] for their pain, and it was. Instead of anesthetizing the pain, what I would began doing was having them really become aware of the pain that they were carrying, locating it in their body, and then finding some way to express it, to externalize it, whether it was crying, talking, screaming, yelling, or just energetic release.
I think some of the workshops you’ve done, you’ve, you’ve, you’ve done that work where you get in touch with that feeling and you can release it energetically through imagery, through breath, through movement. It doesn’t have to be words or it doesn’t have to be a story. And the thing I found early on in my career was that we could spend a lot of time talking about the story.
There was no release, there was no resolution. And in a way, sometimes it seemed [00:27:00] like it was just reinforcing the story, wearing the groove deeper. And so I learned to pretty quickly move past the story into the feeling and then express it. And you know, honestly, it isn’t all pain either. I mean, the flip side of it is that as you express some of those painful experiences that have accumulated and the heart’s more open, you begin to feel more love that you’re able to both express and receive.
Guy: Yeah. What blows my mind as well is nobody told me where to look. I never thought of looking within the body for stored emotions and seeing where within the body and working with it as opposed to, or. Taking something, whether it be food or alcohol or some, something external to suppress their emotion that I hadn’t been quite aware of.
Mm-hmm. And, and, and on and on it continued. I’ve, and speaking from your experience, [00:28:00] I, I just, I just wanna emphasize that a little bit and maybe speak to that a little bit. But have you found then, if somebody is feeling, let’s say, a lot of guilt in their life or there’s, there’s certain debilitating emotions that are holding or could be anger, and if they’re willing to work with that emotion as opposed to suppress it and actually go to where they’re feeling it in the body, it can quite often then, like you say, start to move itself and then it won’t feel that emotion so much and the charge is gone over time.
Paul: Absolutely. So if you pick an emotion, so I think you said guilt at first, right? So guilt, so I. First, it’s good to know that we call our emotions feelings because every emotion has a corresponding physical sensation, and it’s often easier to first recognize, identify [00:29:00] that physical sensation in the body before we even know what the emotion is.
So I feel tightness in my throat. I feel, I feel a fist in my belly. I feel a knot in my stomach, right? So guilt has a few specific sensations. Everyone maybe experiences it somewhat differently, but for me personally, guilt feels very contractive. There’s a, a shrinking that comes with guilt, right? There’s this kind of smallness and, and there’s a, a heaviness I feel with guilt too, kind of. Uh, like wanting to become invisible, you know? Uh, how do you experience guilt when you feel it in your body?
Guy: I, I feel it always in my solar plexus and, and in my belly and
Paul: mm-hmm.
Guy: It makes me, how do I feel? I [00:30:00] feel uneasy and I feel almost unworthiness to myself then, and it feeds into I’m, I am not good enough when I feel guilt.
Paul: Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Guy: Yeah.
Paul: Yeah. And so the, I’m not good enough is part of an even bigger category. Category of not enough. So not enoughness or not enough is a huge category. I’m not enough. There isn’t enough. Right. Or, or, or some parts of this not enough. Yeah. And so guilt very much links to that. Yeah. And so if you can feel that I’m not enough, that guilt, the shame that, that, that, that, go with that, yeah.
Those are specific sensations in the body and now it’s called OB objectification. What it is, is taking this amorphous sensation that we’ve been working [00:31:00] hard to not feel, to not experience, not express, and we can imagine it or experience it as an object. So some people might see it or some people might feel it.
It feels like a rock in my belly. It feels like this contracted fist in my belt. Well, now that it’s some kind of an object, we can interact with it. We can acknowledge its presence. We can even do an inner dialogue with it, and we can find some way to externalize or express it, right. There’s some reason we didn’t express that at the time.
It was painful. It was dangerous. I mean, let’s talk about anger. So anger can feel so dangerous that we’re gonna hurt somebody with it, right? And so we don’t express it and then we hurt, hurt ourselves with it. Internalized anger really causes physical problems, right? And so it’s a natural emotion that we [00:32:00] all experience at times.
And the the key is to acknowledge, yeah, I feel angry. Where do I feel it in my body? I feel it in my belly. I feel it in my throat or my chest. Um, how’s it feel there? It feels like a, a volcano, it feels like a explosion. It feels like a, a red, hot something, right? And so now we can sort of get our hands on it.
We can find a, a way to safely externalize it, to express it. We blast it out as energy. Say the words, write them, you know, but it just, just let it, and then once there’s less anger, I understand that people don’t, I, I don’t wanna act on the anger. I feel I might hurt myself or someone else, but I’ve learned not to swallow it, not to hold it in.
I need to express it. So a good way for me is to stand at the seaside and just shout into the ocean. Ocean can absorb it. It’s, [00:33:00] you know, it’s expressed, it’s not in my body anymore. And then there’s more space.
Guy: Yeah.
Paul: Then I can do something with it or replace it with something that’s more,
Guy: yeah. Beautiful. I’ve always, I’ve found anger, a great, um, motivator sometimes for me to, to move me out of my, whatever it needs to be. And as I express it, it’s, it’s put me on a project trajectory of heart and based intention. Anyway. I found over the, over time if, um. To, to move that.
Paul: Yeah.
Guy: I’m curious as well, before I move on to number four, which I’m, I’m, I’m always fascinated with. Um, do you find that, um, I’m trying to say how I phrase this because all, all the challenges and difficulties that we have in our life, especially if we’re not that aware of this work at first, that we can, so there’s a lot of blame or, or holding on. [00:34:00] And do you, do you find from a deeper soul level that they are there to teach us a lesson, to come to these realizations within ourselves to then be able to express ourselves at a deeper level? No. So
Paul: say it again. Anger and,
Guy: and any, so any, any, um, any emotion that we hold onto that we haven’t. Um, if we’re not aware of this work, so, so incidences and things that happen in our life that can create us holding onto trauma as we then release this and move on it and we’d able to reflect back at a deeper level, are it, are these happening for us or to us for a reason to help teach us and support us as we move on our journey through life?[00:35:00] Yeah. I know. Sorry,
Paul: that’s a big question. Yeah. Um, absolutely. No, no. And there, there are layers to it really. But yes, any pain,
Guy: right?
Paul: Is something to trying to get our attention. And our instinct, or our learned behaviors is to ignore it, anesthetize it, pull away from it. And we need to do exactly the opposite thing. We need to, to go towards it. We need to engage it. We need to enter into a relationship with it. Not pretend it’s not there, not just try to make it go away. ’cause there’s a lesson, there’s something it’s asking for. There’s something in it that we need to, to listen to. And I, I’ve seen many, many, many times working with people in, in chronic pain, working with people in chronic pain that once they got the message, it didn’t [00:36:00] hurt anymore.
Whether it was a emotional pain or a physical pain, it’s the body’s way of getting our attention, really. And if we just listened to it. Sometimes just listening to it’s enough. It doesn’t have to be so loud. It doesn’t have to be so intense. ’cause now it’s got our attention and now we can start to learn from it.
And on a, on a bigger level, what I see and, and work a lot with people on our, our soul lessons. So we have lessons in a lifetime that we’re trying to improve our personality, our psyche, our, our, our character, right? We’re trying to refine ourselves, but our souls incarnate multiple times because the soul is working on refining itself, learning and growing.
Also, I used to think the soul is perfect and it’s not. I believe there’s [00:37:00] something perfect in the soul, but the soul is here. As much as we come to help, we’re also here to learn and grow. And I. Just as human beings hold certain beliefs, so do souls. And all too often a soul in these sessions will find, it holds the belief that suffering is the best way to learn, or I have to suffer in order to learn and then they suffer.
And what guides or telling souls that hold this belief is you can learn through your suffering. I learned through being electrocuted. But there are many ways to learn. You don’t have to suffer to learn. I, I think when there’s a tragedy, when there’s a loss, when there’s [00:38:00] a trauma, yes, we need to do our best to learn from it first.
We need to survive it. Right? And then, and then we do our best to learn from it. It’s, it’s a. It’s an opportunity. It can be your demise or it can be your, your your, your growing and going on even stronger. Right. But I think one of the fundamental issues or challenges in many of us is, uh, uh, underlying belief that somehow through suffering that we need, that we can only learn through suffering or that we have to learn through suffering.
And it, it isn’t true. We can learn from suffering, but there are many more ways to do it. And I think that the universe, the, the, our own soul even or, or our guides are trying to help us move on and, and realize that we don’t have to suffer to
Guy: that. Oh, that’s beautiful. Thank you for sharing that. And that’s so encouraging because we’ve certainly been asked in the past, do I need to suffer to, [00:39:00] to, to make this. To embody this work, you know, and it’s like, not at all. You know, we can, we can proactively move in this and just keep it evolving and expanding from a, a much more, uh, beautiful place as well. Um, I, um, I’m gonna move on to the fourth layer that you have here and, uh, the inner child. And what does, what does that term even mean when it comes to this work?
Paul: Hmm, hmm, hmm. Um, again, from my perspective, there are two aspects, if you will, of our younger self, our inner child. There’s the wounded child, there’s the part of us that’s somehow stuck in the past from some disappointment, hurts, wounds, trauma, and, and continues to sort of live in that energy and, and in that [00:40:00] experience, I.
That, that is in need of what we call re-parenting. It’s in need of being basically rescued, loved, made to feel safe, loved, and wanted. There’s a whole list in the book of some of the phrases, some of the things that child self is in need of hearing your love needed, wanted, or, or, or some of the safe, loved, needed, and wanted are some of the, the big ones.
And the other aspect of the inner child is the one that I call the wonder child. It’s the, it’s the intact child. It’s, it’s, it’s something you probably see in your child. There’s a, there’s a wonderment, there’s a, a wisdom, there’s a curiosity, there’s a, a playfulness, there’s a spontaneity. And, and often this gets sort of left behind.
We prematurely adopt responsibility and caretaking and kind of try to become an adult or a parent when we’re, we’re way too young for that. And we lose [00:41:00] some of the playfulness of the child and, and reconnecting with the child self that is, um, spontaneous and playful, uh, creative. Uh, it is so transformative in healing.
It. It’s not dead or gone, but it’s often kind of abandoned or we just lost touch with it. Right. And the inner child. Especially the Wonder Child is much closer to the authentic self, to the core self, to to ourself. Before we went through a lot of the experiences we’ve had in our life, it’s more the original, um, self. And that child self is really a important, I believe, because it’s a tremendous resource that can help us continue the journey inward towards that soul essence, towards that, uh, course
Guy: of, I love the Wonder Child. I, I, um, I, it, it makes me think. I, I used to, [00:42:00] um, live with one of my best mates when we were rooming years ago, and he, he worked in it and, um. And I always still see this to this day. This is like 15 years ago. And on his screensaver, on his pc, when the, when the computer used to like go to standby, the words what if used to come up and they would rotate.
Paul: Mm-hmm.
Guy: And I would, and I would see that every morning because he’d go to bed and I’d get up into, into the kitchen the morning and I’d see these words, what if, and it always sparked that curiosity, like, wow, what if of all the possibilities that, that are out there, and I can explore that as opposed to just shutting down to the, the, the, and then not even looking at what possibilities are and then going into worst case scenario, you know? And, uh, it’s certainly served me well over the years by, by having that mantra embedded in me. Yeah,
Paul: absolutely. Yeah,
Guy: yeah, yeah.
Paul: Love
Guy: it. Um,
Paul: it’s a good one.
Guy: What if, yeah,
Paul: I gotta [00:43:00] remember that one.
Guy: Fifth layer parts.
Paul: Yeah, so we have different parts or aspects of our psyche. So some would call them archetypes, um, and it’s related. Um, but there are different parts of our ourself in play all the time. And so once you’re more out of your mind and your consciousness is, is expanded and you’ve worked through some of the emotions and, and connect, not that, uh, al always goes in the same order but made contact with inner child.
The child is a part of ourself too. But there are some real key parts that that can be problematic and that we all struggle with, I believe. And one of those parts is the inner critic, [00:44:00] right? So it’s that inner voice that says, ah. Could have, should have done that better or you never do that good enough.
Or sometimes the inner critic will adopt a critical voice of a parent or a teacher or preacher or someone external that’s even more troublesome. But, um, inner critics, original intent or intention is a part of us to ensure that we do our best. But as it becomes overly critical, it, it kind of takes on a life of its own and it ends up wearing us down.
It ends up eroding self-esteem, esteem, the very thing that it’s there to prevent. And so there’s a process I’ll take people through, or that’s in the book that people can do for themselves is, is to make contact with the inner critic and again, enter into a relationship with it. Have a dialogue with it.
Ask what its purpose is when it came into being, what made it necessary, why it’s [00:45:00] so harsh. And the, the, the key or the intention is to have the inner critic realize that it’s causing harm by being so critical and to help it change how it does its job. I, I want it to become a cheerleader. I want it to become an inner advocate.
Imagine if you had a voice saying, good job. You know, it’s, it’s like if you tell a child they’re doing it wrong all the time, they lose their confidence. Right? It really destroys the child. But if you tell a, and of course we need to teach children, but if you tell a child, good job, if you acknowledge them, um, and encourage them, they’ll blossom.
Right? So it’s the same thing with self, this inner critic, um, wearing us down needs to realize it can support us. And, and, and there’s a process for doing that. Uh, another part that I think is really important is the, the protector. We all have a [00:46:00] part that’s active in us whose, whose purpose really is to, to keep us safe, right?
But how it’s doing that often causes trouble, right? It, it makes sure I don’t go into a relationship. It makes sure I don’t become too famous. It makes sure that, uh, and it, it wants to keep us safe, but it really limits us. It ends up often causing some of the very, very things it’s there to prevent causing harm.
And, and these parts don’t. Intend harm. They’re not evil or wanting to destroy us or damage us, but from a limited kind of realm of choices learned early on how to do their job in a way that ends up being harmful. And once that part understands that its actions are causing harm, it won’t do that anymore. And we just need, need to give it something [00:47:00] new or something else to do that’s more beneficial. Uh, and helpful. Yeah. So that’s, that’s parts.
Guy: Wow. I think. Yeah. No, I think everyone, uh, listening to this can really, to those, that’s for sure. I, I think about, um. I think about even just myself on my own journey and as I’ve put myself out there more and, um, got involved in this work more and then to help other people and serve as well. I’m, I’m, I’m always hitting those parts of myself, you know, and it’s like, oh, there’s a new aspect I, I didn’t see there. Let’s, let’s create that relationship with it. What’s going on here? I’m working with it. Otherwise, I, I didn’t, I, for so long, I unconsciously didn’t realize I was just staying in a certain circumference of or parameter that I had identified myself with.
And I would never go up beyond that ’cause I, you know, because of those parts holding me back. The critic and [00:48:00] the survivor. Yeah.
Paul: And there are many parts. I mean, someone suffers with anxiety, for instance. Yeah. They can work with the anxious one. You know, you don’t wanna feel anxious, you try to fight it. You tell yourself, calm down. I say connect with the anxious one. Have a dialogue. What’s it concern, what’s it mean? Right. And, and, and it’s really a direct way of dealing with anxiety is to talk with the anxious one. And then while there’s a practice in the beginning of the book about safe place and working with turning down the emergency warning system in the control room of the mind that, you know, when we have events that we have to stay on alert to stay safe, that emergency warning system gets overdeveloped, if you will.
It becomes too sensitive. It’s, and, and, and, um, there’s a technique to turn it down so that we can be in a more, more calm place also.[00:49:00]
Guy: Yeah. Beautiful. And then from parts going into the, the sick play, then you got baggage.
Paul: Yeah, for sure. So in a, in short, we. Knowingly or unknowingly, and often out of loyalty, take on certain beliefs, whether it’s conscious or not. Like, not enough. So when I was young, parents were divorced. Mothers working two, three jobs. The not enough time, not enough money, the not enough wasn’t something I believe she ever really said to us, but it was pretty clear. I really absorbed it. I took that on. I, I lived with this belief of not enough. It was one of the bags that I carried from, from my early childhood. Not enough, not enough money, not enough time.
Not enough energy. Not [00:50:00] enough. Not enough. I’m not enough. Right? And so there’s a process that you can do to identify what some of those beliefs, some of that baggage is, guilt, shame, anger, you know, we absorb it from our. Parents. We absorb it from our home. We absorb it from our, our community, we absorb it from our ancestors.
Right? There’s guilt that can be passed down even if you don’t know the stories, you inherited it. That’s why we also call it ancestral healing. And so the, the first process with the baggage is to say, this guilt, this shame, this anger, this, whatever it is I’m carrying for you. We start with, the parents usually can be a, a sibling or, or someone in our close circle.
Um, and we say, well, with love and respect, ’cause we don’t wanna do in anger, we don’t, don’t wanna cause harm, but with love and respect. I return [00:51:00] this to you. I, I’ve carried it for most of my life. And, and believed it was mine, but it isn’t mine. And I, I give it back to you. I return it to you and energetically return it and we tell the one we’re returning it to that they can give it back to whoever they got it from so it can go back to source.
We don’t just release it into the universe, but we re release it back to the person it came from and tell them that they can return it to whoever they got it from. And in this way, we’re accomplishing healing and release for many more people than the one person we’re working with or the one person doing the practicing a book. So it has a kind of a domino effect. Yeah.
Guy: Yeah.
Paul: So, yeah.
Guy: Amazing. Amazing.
Paul: It really, and you can feel it when you do it, so you can feel it going all the way back and, and. There’s, there’s cultural baggage [00:52:00] too, right? Each country or ethnicity carries certain baggage as well. And so that can go back pretty far. And the reverse is true too. There are many gifts from our ancestors that we can receive. Once we’ve given some baggage back, then we can receive those gifts, those creativity, that, um, inspiration. Uh, certain talents even might be playing music or something that we can receive from our ancestors.
Ancestors as well. Uh, there’s another version of it too. Stop me from talking too much, but, um, that often children, you know, we are picking stuff up in the womb too, by the way. Before we’re born, we’re already absorbing this. We’re carrying this stuff from there. I have traced so many cases of anxiety. Panic attacks back to pre-birth. And that’s why it’s so hard to [00:53:00] resolve sometimes is it’s pre-verbal or it’s pre-birth and, and no one knows to look there, you know? But it comes from before. Yeah.
Guy: I, I know it’s, um, I’ll say this ’cause even my, ’cause my mom wa, my mom is my biggest fan. She watches the show and there’s no doubt she’ll get to a point where she watches this. So, hi mom. Um, but, uh, Petra took me through a, uh, a regression and, and I was back in my mom’s womb and I felt her anxiety and her worry, financial worry at the time in that moment.
And it was the first time, and this was only going back six months ago or whatever. And, and, and I was able to, to release that and, and send it back. My mom and, and back to source. It was incredible. And I felt a shift, you know, and never in a million years would I have thought or, or known or felt that.
Paul: And it’s so influential in our, in our [00:54:00] lives. It so influences us.
Guy: Um, yeah, it’s remarkable. Um, laying number seven in a wisdom. Do you mind speaking to that?
Paul: Oh, for sure. So there are different ways to access inner wisdom and this, this is a specific one where, um, we get out of our mind, go through our heart, go through the layers, and make contact with the wise one within the wise woman, within the wise man within, right? Doesn’t have to be gender, although there are, there are more masculine and more feminine energies. But it’s a way to, in a somewhat personified way, connect with this wise one within. And it, it.
When someone walks through my door of my clinic and I do this session with them, they walk out a transformed person. And it’s not something [00:55:00] I gave to them or did to them, but it’s something I helped them find within themselves. And I, I love that more than anything. It’s, that’s so empowering to know that, ah, I don’t have to just think about my problems or try to figure out a solution to them.
I don’t have to go to a guru or a priest or a someone else, but I can actually find a place with inside myself to connect with real wisdom and guidance that, that I can then use my good mental mind to figure out, okay, now what do I do about this? But the answer comes from not another person, and not from my my brain, but from a.
A source of wisdom within that I, I believe, is connected to the all. And so it’s a very, um, practical way of connecting with that and, and I think changing this sort of upside down pattern that we have [00:56:00] in our lives of, I think, I feel, and I know to, I know. I feel and I think, okay, what do I do with that?
Guy: Flip it.
Paul: Yep. Flip it.
Guy: Absolutely. Yeah. Beautiful. Um, number eight, soul memory.
Paul: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Right. Practice past life aggression. For a long time before I met Michael Newton and was introduced to the life between life, work and one of the. Parts of the methodology that he developed was to do past life by going through childhood womb and past life. And I hadn’t been going, I’ve just been inducing and going straight to past life.
Right. And in when you regress from childhood to in utero to in the womb, subconscious [00:57:00] mind doesn’t exist. Personality hasn’t developed. There’s some indications of it, but what you have there is soul mind. You have the consciousness of the soul that’s just beginning the process of incarnation. And it’s a place where you can regress back to, to reconnect with that more authentic soul consciousness before it is integrated into the human mind.
And before it’s. Influenced by the human personality. And so I, I had someone who came to me from Buenos Aires that, that was a young single mother and really, really worn down by life and was, I think the only reason she hadn’t ended her life was that she had this young daughter that she didn’t wanna do that to.
Guy: Mm-hmm.
Paul: But she was close, [00:58:00] not working. And anyway, um, regressing her back in the womb, she is this amazingly enthusiastic, curious, powerful soul coming into this body. And she was able to reconnect with that true self, that soul nature that was full of power and enthusiasm and excitement. And wake that up again.
Remember that, not just remember, but re-experience that that’s who she is and, and. She wrote me six months later and said, life is great. I’m working again. I’m in such a better place. You know? And again, it wasn’t something I did to her or for her, but I facilitated her getting there and just remembering and re-experiencing, reconnecting with her soul consciousness.
Really. So soul memory, I think most of us wanna know, why am I here? What am I [00:59:00] here to learn? What am I here to do? We all have some idea or concept of that, but this is a way to remember that. And I think our lives are much more guided and directed when we can do that.
Guy: Wow, that’s so powerful. And it makes me think of your quote that you said, remember who you are and be that.
Paul: Yeah,
Guy: that’s exactly that. Yeah. And then on the ninth layer, we got soul essence.
Paul: Mm-hmm. So I think for me. The wise one within is very connected with that soul essence. Um, but the soul, for me, the soul, when I first contacted my soul essence, it was really more of a, it seemed like a flame. And as I approached it, it, it grew bigger.
As I acknowledged it, it grew bigger. And so it was less personified, if you will. It wasn’t like a, a being or a person like the wise woman or wise man could be. [01:00:00] Um, it was just this inner light that I recognized I had, well basically put it away for safekeeping early on because life and, and family felt threatening to me.
And so I said, no, you’re not gonna get that from me. I’m gonna keep it safe. And in keeping it safe. I lost touch with it over time. And this was a reunion, this was a, uh, yeah. Reunion and I went into that flame. It enveloped me, and it, it just felt like it was able to begin burning away those layers that had encrusted it, that it had hidden it, that had diminished it in some way. And I, I really felt a, a kind of a flame dancing flame, if you will, that that carried on for days and, and that
Guy: Wow.
Paul: I think ever, yeah, I think ever since then has been working [01:01:00] to raise consciousness in me and others and has been working to break through those crusts of those beliefs and protections and, and survival strategies really.
So that’s soul essence. Yeah. Um. Hmm. And that’s my goal really, is to people back there, to, to, to remember that that’s there. I’m not the things people said to me or did to me, or some of the difficult experiences I’ve had, they’re my experiences, but it’s not who I am. This is who I am, and I just wanna keep living from there as much as possible.
Guy: Yeah. Wow. That again, that is so powerful. I just keep thinking of my own journey. When I connected to my soul lessons and realized who I truly was, it’s so much fear evaporated from my life. It wasn’t funny, like just instantaneously. And I started to see things from a different vantage point.
Paul: Mm-hmm.
Guy: And, and you start to make different decisions based from this place, and [01:02:00] it’s, and then you throw in the Wonder child there, and, and it’s, it’s incredible. You know, it’s, it is, Paul, it’s just amazing. You, you’ve released this book. What is your hopes for this book? What is your intention?
Paul: Well, I’d love to see it in the hands of as many people as possible because it teaches people how to do a lot of this for themselves. I mean, of course I do sessions, of course I do workshops. But, um, and, and there are places where people will get stuck. I know I did and, and do. Um, but I really wanted to or want to put as much of this in people’s hands for them to do with themselves so that, especially people that might not be able to attend a workshop or individual session, here it is, it’s not a secret.
People say, oh, well, how come you’re telling everyone the secrets of what you do Well, because I want it out there and I want as many people as possible and benefit from it really. [01:03:00]
Guy: Beautiful. Well, it’s all in there. Like I say, I’ve been making my way through it, and there’s so much, so much wisdom in there, Paul, and I’m, and I’m so happy that you’ve put something together like this and put it out to the world, that’s for sure. Thank you. I, um, I, I have one more question that I ask everyone on the show, Paul, and, um, and that is with everything we’ve covered today, what would you like, uh, to leave our listeners to ponder on?
Paul: I’ll share the message I received when I was out of body and during my near death experience. And, and that was, listen, listen, listen to your heart. Listen to your soul. Listen to spirit, listen, and, and I think it’s a process of learning to listen. Getting through the layers that you can really hear, but [01:04:00] listen.
Guy: Hmm. Beautiful. Thank you. Thank you, thank you. And I believe your book is on our audible as well, where if I link to the show notes, where’s the best place to send everyone if they want to grab a copy? Paul,
Paul: it is on Audible and on Audible. There’s a professional reader. Great. Tom Parks did a great job reading it, but the practices I read, so it’s in my voice. We wanted to do that because we wanted the tone and the pace, right. So the, i it’s really guiding people through the practices, um, rather than just having to do them for themselves, uh, in the print book. But it’s at all books, sellers. It’s on Amazon everywhere Today it was released in Europe and around the world, um, July or June 1st, it was released in the US so it’s available almost everywhere now.
And it’s, the Spanish book will be out pretty soon. It’s being translated now. And, uh, other foreign translations will be out in a year. It takes about a year to get that done.
Guy: Wow. [01:05:00] Amazing. Amazing. I have no doubt it’ll be a, a, a huge success. Paul, I just wanna thank you for everything. Thank you for coming on the show. Thank you for all that you do. And, um, yeah, there’s, there’s so much I could learn from you. It’s not funny. And uh, I just really appreciate you giving us your time today and, uh, being on there. So thanks Paul.
Paul: Pleasure. It’s an honor. You have a great show. You have great speakers, great, great people you’re interviewing. Thanks for doing what you do. You’re welcome. Thanks for being here. Thanks for having me.